BargainBinBlasphemy
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EBAY LINK — ACQUIRE THIS ARTIFACT AND OTHERS LIKE IT THROUGH THE GLORY OF RITUAL AUCTION COMBAT
THE BLASPHEMER GRIMACES UPON YOU WITH THE SPIRIT OF THIS JOYLESS, MISERABLE AND MEANINGLESS SEASON.
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THE SEASON OF SUFFERING IS UPON YOU. BEGINNING THIS EVENING AT 6:30, SIX (6) SIX WORKS OF THE BLASPHEMER WILL BE MADE AVAILABLE ON EBAY. THIS YULETIDE GIVE YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY WHAT THEY TRULY DESERVE: A WRETCHED CURSE SPAWNED IN THE BLACKNESS BEYOND THE STARS.
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LET THE BLOOD OF THE FALSE STAIN THE SANDS OF EBAY ONCE MORE
ENTIRELY NOT DUE TO POPULAR DEMAND, THE BLASPHEMER, WHO PAYS NO ATTENTION TO THE CLAMOR OF THE MOB, HAS DECREED ENTIRELY OF ITS OWN ACCORD THAT SEVERAL MORE ARTIFACTS OF AN ELDRITCH AND TERRIBLE NATURE BE PLACED UPON THE EBAY AS THE SPOILS OF COMBAT.
LET THE BIDDING COMMENCE THIS EVENING BETWEEN 7-8PM PST.
ARTIFACTS SHALL INCLUDE THE TIMELESS SATAN & GARFUNKEL CLASSIC, ALL LIFE ENDS.
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FINAL 7 HOURS TO BID
THE COMBAT ENDS BETWEEN 7-8PM PST. THIS NIGHT, THE PACT WILL BE SEALED UNDER THE LEERING, OBSCENELY GIBBOUS MOON.
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TWO DAYS REMAIN
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FLEE BEFORE THE TIDE OF CHAOS
THE BLASPHEMER HAS DECREED THAT ITS ELDRITCH ARTIFACTS SHALL BE DISTRIBUTED TO THE MOST WORTHY. THE GHASTLY PRIMORDIAL FLAME OF THIS SALE SHALL BE EXTINGUISHED WEDNESDAY:
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UNHOLIDAY SALE
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BARGAIN BIN BLASPHEMY ARTIFACTS ON SALE
BOB SATAN AND THE SILVER BULLET CIRCLE - “STRANGER FROM HELL”
ATTENTION BARGAIN BIN BLASPHEMY CULT:
THE BLASPHEMER HIMSELF WILL BE MAKING AN APPEARANCE THIS UNHOLY SABBATH JULY 27 AT THE WHITE OWL SOCIAL CLUB IN SOUTHEAST PORTLAND, OREGON, UNITED STATES, HELL.
BLASPHEMOUS ARTIFACTS OF ELDRITCH PORTENT SHALL BE SOLD AND YOU MAY BRING YOUR OWN ITEMS TO BE DAMNED BY THE INFERNAL HAND OF THE BLASPHEMER.
THIS IS ALSO A REMINDER THAT THE WORKS OF THE BLASPHEMER MAY NOW BE EXCLUSIVELY BEHELD ON THE HELLISH PLANE OF INSTAGRAM, @BARGAINBINBLASPHEMY.
SUFFER
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GöRDöN LIGHTBRINGER - “GöRD’S COLD”
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LESS THAN 6 HOURS REMAIN
